Sunday, April 12, 2009

Making an ess of myself.

When I was going to get married, the teachers in the staffroom asked me gently how I would like to be addressed once I am married. Would Mrs. Clifford be alright? What about Mrs. Simon? I asked what is wrong with Mrs. Ess?

Yes, with eyes wide opened I chose to marry an Ess knowing full well the consequences of assuming this surname. I knew that I would become the butt of a joke (pun intended) whenever I introduce myself.

I first meet my Ess when he was only fifteen and I was eighteen. We meet when we went carolling during Christmas. We did not get to know each other well until the following Easter Week. It was Holy Thursday and we were in the Youth Group in St. Joseph's Church. We were suppose to pray the whole night during the Vigil.

At three in the morning, during the screening of Ben Hur, my Ess started to ask everybody to go to Fort Canning to watch the sunrise. At first I thought that several people were coming along but in the end only my Ess and I went to see the sun rise.

Although the sun did not rise, we were not disappointed. I enjoyed listening to him talk while he enjoyed my listening. I was surprised at his maturity and his sincerity.

As our relationship developed, we faced many challenges. Firstly, there were violent objections from my parents to the nun and priest who felt that he was the wrong choice for a life partner. He was younger than I was, of different race and I was going to the university while he was going to do his O level. Our courtship took seven years to prove to everyone that we were serious.

The second challenge was to keep ourselves chaste for each other. In the 1980's there were no chastity pledge or ring to remind us to be chaste. Of course we were tempted on many occasions and at times we wanted to have sex just to get it over with. It was his deep love for me that prevented us from having pre-marital sex. Form his demonstration of self-control, I could infer that he would remain faithful to me when we are married.

This Holy Thursday, I would have known my Ess for 27 years, married for 20 years.

After all these years, I am very thankful that my Ess still remain faithful , loving, guiding and correcting me when I make an ass of myself. As you can see from the pictures posted on this blog, my Ess is pleasant to the eye.

Several women had warned me that if I am not careful, I would lose my Ess. Once a lady said that she would have taken my Ess if I was not her friend.

Recently, my Ess demonstrated once again that when force to choose to be a married single or a couple, he chose the latter. He told the person in no uncertain term that if you want the Ess, the wife comes with the package.

I am glad that I am blessed with the opportunity to be an Ess and proud of it.

I pray constantly that my children will be blessed with as good a spouse as I have been given.